):

i miss everything .
everything that was ,
that used to be .
everything comforting ,
and fun,
and happy .
i especially miss those memories .

and i think . . .
that school is pretty gay ,
church is getting distant ,
feelings are fading ,
feelings are getting stronger,
friendships are fading ,
new ones are forming ,
for the better ,
maybe for the . . bad ?

there's nothing to look forward to anymore ,
everything is one constant, dull , boring , continuous hum ,
that never changes , and only meets downhill slopes ,
never uphills .
or not ?
well , for me at least .

there's still summer to come ,
but somehow , it just doesn't seem any more special or exciting .

i dont know ,
i just miss it all .
&& at the same time ,
i dont reall know what i miss .
actually , i dont really know what i want anymore .